The Procession to Calvary is an intentionally peculiar point-and-click narrative told through a collage of renaissance paintings. You play a warrior on a quest to capture the former ruler of the land, talking to (or killing) people, interacting with objects, and solving puzzles as you go. The unusual premise, setting and general irreverent, Monty Python-style humour match the strange choices you must make to create a surreal but strangely compelling experience.

After the tyrannical reign of Heavenly Peter comes to a close, a time of peace ensues. But he escapes capture, leading your character, a strong (and murder-inclined) warrior, to ask the new leader, Immortal John, for permission to find and kill Peter. When he accepts, you set out on your quest, which sees you explore the land, meeting rulers, peasants, and everyone in between, solving puzzles to earn favours or unlock new options and areas until you complete your quest or fail trying.

Play involves moving around the richly detailed screens, locating the items and people you can interact with. Every location is a wacky collage of different famous renaissance paintings by artists like Rembrandt and Michelangelo, creating an unusual and comical scene. Each object or person can be interacted with in three distinct ways, each resulting in a different outcome that shifts the story.

Often, you need to complete puzzles to make progress, with some requiring specific choices and actions. Alternatively, you can simply murder whoever's preventing you from advancing, although this can quickly lead to disastrous consequences. Each of the three distinct endings is a direct result of how you decide to play, be that carefully solving puzzles and avoiding violence or doing quite the opposite.

The result is a bizarre mashup of classical art and music with a strange, darkly humorous and comedic story that creates an unusual space in which your actions and decisions shape your adventure.